Hope After Loss
(Frazzled)

“Your absence has gone through me
Like thread through a needle.
Everything I do is stitched with its color.”

W.S.Merwin

One thing is for certain in life. We will all have to deal with the loss of someone we care deeply for in this life. I don’t believe we ever overcome our grief. Time will ease our suffering, but it is always there just beneath the surface like the residuals of a storm in the aftermath. The void that sets in seems to take over our lives.

Grief is experienced differently for everyone. I remember the day my mother died. Quite suddenly without warning. I was only 46 years old. We were extremely close. There were feelings of hopelessness, disbelief, anger, overwhelming sadness, shock. I would stand in the living room, not knowing what to do next. The numbness had set in. I lost track of time. I cried for days, weeks. My eyes so swollen and yet the tears kept flowing.

There is no complete emotional healing because part of ourselves is taken away. We don’t stop loving someone because they are gone. In fact, I believe we feel that love even stronger after their departure. We think of things we could have said, signs we missed. Though in reality, nothing would have changed the outcome.

How do we cope then? I often light a candle and let it burn in front of a photo of my loved one. It brings me comfort and is a symbol of HOPE. Rituals are important, so create one that will bring you a sense of peace. Hold onto your dreams and know that your loved ones are still right by your side. Guiding you until you are reunited with them once again.